Hymns Very Modern, Revised & Charred
In late September 2001, JTA was attacked by a lunatic waving a white-hot poker, with which he lunged forwards in an ill-concieved assassination attempt.
Thankfully, JTA survived, as the poker merely scorched a hole right through his school hymnbook, before cooling down enough for JTA to remove it and bash his would-be murderer sharply on the back of his head as he attempted to hide himself behind a lampost.
Thankful for his narrow escape from the police, following this killing-in-probably-self-defence, JTA became a Monk for a full three days, and re-wrote several classic hymns and carols, the best of which are now reproduced for you to print out and sing at your nearest availiable Church.